You ever catch someone talking to themselves at the gym, in the car, or while doing the dishes—and your first thought is, What’s going on with this guy?
We’ve been taught to think that people who talk out loud when they’re alone are either eccentric, odd, or maybe even a little unstable.
But here’s the truth: people who talk to themselves often aren’t confused at all. In fact, more often than not, they’re sharper than you think. More grounded. More in tune with what’s happening inside them.
I’m not talking about shouting at the clouds or reenacting an argument that never actually happened (we’ve all been there, though). I’m talking about the kind of inner dialogue that leaks out into the open—the muttering under your breath when you’re focused, or the pep talk before a hard conversation. That voice you use when you’re working through a decision, calming your nerves, or reminding yourself of what actually matters.
That’s not weird. That’s self-regulation.
And it turns out, it’s one of the most useful tools a person can have.
Why talking to yourself works
From a psychological standpoint, talking to yourself—what researchers call “self-talk”—serves a real function.
Studies have shown that self-talk helps improve concentration, increases performance, and enhances emotional regulation. In plain language? It helps you think clearer and act smarter.
And it makes sense when you think about it. We all have that inner dialogue anyway—it’s running 24/7 in the background. But when you say things out loud, you’re forcing your brain to slow down. You’re taking abstract thoughts and putting them into language. That small shift makes your ideas more real, more manageable, and a hell of a lot easier to sort through.
Think about when you’re trying to learn something new. Saying the steps out loud locks them in. You’re not just passively thinking—you’re processing. You’re engaged.
Talking to yourself is like being your own coach, therapist, and teammate rolled into one.
It’s not just a brain quirk—it’s a strategy
One of the most underappreciated things about people who talk to themselves is that it’s often a form of mental rehearsal. Athletes do this all the time. So do musicians, public speakers, even soldiers. They walk through scenarios out loud. They talk through routines, visualize outcomes, and give themselves instructions.
Muhammad Ali, in his days used to mutter affirmations under his breath all the time—“I am the greatest.” That wasn’t arrogance. That was mental conditioning. He was programming his body and brain for what he wanted to become.
We do the same thing in smaller ways.
You’re in traffic and you say, “Alright, don’t lose it. Just get through this.” That’s self-soothing.
You’re prepping for a hard phone call and muttering, “Just tell him what happened; keep it calm.” That’s grounding.
Even something like, “Keys, wallet, phone…” as you leave the house? That’s you reinforcing short-term memory.
It’s not a lack of awareness. It’s more awareness. You’re keeping yourself aligned.
Self-talk can keep you from spiraling
Let’s be honest—our heads can be noisy places. When things go sideways, that internal monologue can turn dark quick. Self-doubt. Criticism. That voice that tells you you’re screwing it all up.
But when you talk to yourself intentionally, especially out loud, you create some separation between you and that storm of thoughts.
You start to respond to your thoughts instead of getting sucked in by them.
There’s a real difference between thinking I’m such an idiot and saying, “Okay, I made a mistake. What can I do to fix it?”
That shift from shame to strategy? That’s huge. And people who talk to themselves often make that leap quicker than those who bottle it all up.
You’re not just venting—you’re adjusting. Reframing. Working the problem.
It builds emotional maturity, not just mental clarity
This is something I’ve noticed in people I respect—especially men who’ve done a bit of work on themselves. They don’t shove their emotions down. They process. And yeah, sometimes that means you’ll hear them talking to themselves in the garage or pacing while muttering through something.
That’s not weakness. I think that’s someone sorting out a situation before it explodes.
I’ve been there myself. When I was younger, I’d hold everything in. Pride told me to “be a man” and keep quiet. All that did was turn me into a pressure cooker. Now? If I’m feeling overwhelmed, I talk it out—even if it’s just me in the room.
“Alright, what’s really going on here?” I’ll say. “Why did that get under my skin?” And just like that, I’m starting to understand myself a little better.
That’s not weird. That’s emotional self-discipline.
The line between madness and mindfulness
Now look, if someone’s pacing up and down the street shouting at invisible enemies, that’s not what we’re talking about here. There are forms of disordered thinking where externalized inner dialogue is part of a bigger issue.
But that’s not most people.
Most people who talk to themselves are simply using a tool. Some do it to pump themselves up. Some do it to reason through a conflict. Others do it to stay focused, stay calm, or stay connected to what they value.
And honestly? It takes guts.
In a world where everyone’s trying to look chill and put-together, talking to yourself in public (even quietly) can feel risky. People stare. They assume you’re unstable. But you know what?
There’s strength in not needing to look cool every second of the day.
There’s strength in being the kind of person who’s willing to work through stuff out loud, even if someone side-eyes you at the grocery store.
Final thoughts: Maybe they’re not weird—maybe they’re ahead of the game
So next time you catch someone talking to themselves, don’t assume they’re unhinged.
They might be more dialed in than anyone in the room.
They’re checking their emotions, clarifying their priorities, regulating their mindset, and getting through their day with a little more awareness than most people give them credit for.
And if you’re someone who does it yourself?
Good.
Keep talking.
It means you’re listening to yourself—and these days, that’s a rare kind of strength.